Sunday, June 28, 2009

How to Identify a Hipster

What is a hipster? In the parlance of our times, the word hipster is used to label a set of people who A) generally dress fashionably (perhaps a little TOO fashionably), B) live in an urban setting (perhaps a little TOO urban), and C) hold liberal political views (perhaps... nevermind). There are a few myths about hipsters that I would like to dispel...

Hipsters will not eat your dog. This is an old wives' tale used to create a solid distinction between "us" and "them". Hipsters will not steal your chapstick. I can't really imagine how this one even came into existence, because I know a lot of hipsters, and I leave chapstick laying around all the time, but I have never found it missing (that's an odd phrase - found it missing... a non sequitur).

How do hipsters dress? Imagine a pirate - not a captain, but like a first mate. Now imagine that pirate walking down the sidewalk outside your house. That's it! Hipsters look a lot like pirates. They like to wear deck shoes, long, cutoff jean-shorts that hang just below the knee, exposing the ankle and calf, perhaps a bandanna on the head or around the arm, and a beard, or at least some third-fourth day scruff, and definitely some piercings and tattoos. It's important to remember, however, that hipsters are NOT pirates.

Hipsters are not pirates. A real buccaneer would never be seen driving a Volvo, or wearing a scarf. Likewise, you would never see a swashbuckler riding a scooter. You can't swashbuckle on a scooter, it's too tame. Actually, maybe the connection between pirates and hipsters is why those terrible myths about them stealing your chapstick and eating your dog exist. Ha! I guess a hipster is a scarfy dog. Or maybe they like to scarf some dog. Hm.

Goat Milk

Today I tried goat milk. Why? Because it was there, in the supermarket, and I've never had it before. I love it! I tastes like a milk version of goat cheese - what a shocker! I've formed a mild taste obsession with goat cheese over the past year. Now I can get that awesome flavor in my granola as well! Goat milk is delicious, and some say it's actually healthier for humans than cow milk. Huh!

Savory French Toast

Today the light bulb went on for me with french toast. I had only about a quarter-loaf of this Companion Sourdough Olive bread, and it was about 90% dry, hard as a rock. I wanted to eat an egg and some chorizo, but I needed some toast. You know already where I'm going w/this

I think I remember from an episode of Good Eats that while french toast in America is served dessert-like, some parts of the world (like France, maybe?) eat a more savory french toast. Also, french toast is supposed to be made with stale bread, and one can easily imagine how it was first conceived: You have this stale bread, so you need to moisten it somehow, but then you also need to toast it: bring on the milk-soak and a frying pan. So here I go with this sourdough olive bread, the only bread I have, so I'm forced into it, but you know, it's one of the most brilliant moves I've ever made in a kitchen! I mean this french toast turns out to be the star of the meal!

I just beat one egg (I only had two) in some milk, saw the bread brick into two slices, and soak them in the mixture for about a minute, then fry them in about three pats of butter. It is utterly and completely mind-blowing delicious! I served them with the other egg, over medium, and a nice big patty of chorizo, and my favorite China Keemun tea with honey. The faint smokiness and full body of the keemun mixes with the hearty sweetness of the honey in perfect concinnity, and pairs so well with the sourdough olive french toast and egg, I can hardly believe I threw the meal together with only the last dregs I could muster for breakfast.

Truly a good day when such an unexpected treat is discovered. I will definitely be trying more savory french toast variations.